Home Mental Health Why Am I So Lonely? 9 Doable Causes Why — Talkspace

Why Am I So Lonely? 9 Doable Causes Why — Talkspace

Why Am I So Lonely? 9 Doable Causes Why — Talkspace


Printed on: 18 Oct 2023

Why You May Feel So LonelyWhy You May Feel So Lonely

Loneliness is a common human emotion, one thing that everybody experiences at one level or one other in life. Although it’s regular, feeling lonely could be a devastating, crushing expertise.

If you happen to’ve ever felt so lonely that it’s affecting your life, social relationships, job, or skill to operate, it’s time to get assist. Extreme loneliness can result in extra important points, like melancholy, nervousness, or, in excessive instances, ideas of suicide. 

Realizing why you are feeling so lonely is important to beat your emotions and discover methods to attach with others. Whenever you perceive the foundation explanation for your loneliness, you can begin implementing efficient coping instruments. 

Be taught concerning the frequent causes of loneliness and the right way to tackle them right here. 

1. Lack of Significant Connections

Not having deep connections or significant relationships with others can significantly influence psychological well-being, and feeling lonely usually stems from an absence of those connections. Folks usually really feel lonely in school as they navigate new crowds of individuals they don’t know. It’s not often concerning the variety of individuals you already know, and usually extra about how important your relationships are. 

Even in a big social setting or crowd, individuals can nonetheless really feel remoted. This phenomenon is called perceived social isolation, and it will possibly happen anytime you’re bodily current with others however don’t really feel related on both an emotional or an mental degree. 

2. Social Anxiousness & Shyness

Social nervousness and shyness may be the perpetrator for emotions of loneliness. 

Social nervousness can stop you from forming lasting relationships all through life. The situation is about greater than being shy, although — social nervousness manifests as a profound, paralyzing concern of social interactions and conditions that’s so extreme that it will possibly result in avoidant behaviors, particularly in social actions. 

“People with social nervousness are at better threat for loneliness. Emotions of loneliness could also be brought on by an absence of interpersonal relationships, bodily isolation, and divorce.”

Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW 

3. Lack of Beloved Ones

Shedding a beloved one can create a void that in the end results in loneliness. Loss and grief can intensely influence psychological well-being, and it’s not unusual to really feel excessive loneliness when somebody near you is not in your life.

4. Relocation 

Relocating to a brand new place could be a catalyst for loneliness for some individuals. Whereas shifting may be thrilling, feeling lonely is frequent when you can’t set up a powerful social reference to individuals in your new surroundings.

5. Lack of Hobbies or Shared Pursuits

The feeling of loneliness can take over each side of your world. It will probably depart you with out the need or vitality to take a position time into hobbies or shared pursuits — issues that may be capable of deliver you pleasure and aid you foster connections. With out having hobbies, you would possibly really feel additional remoted from others.

6. Life Transitions & Getting old

The journey via life and growing old can result in emotions of loneliness. Each main life transition we expertise later in life — from retirement to dropping individuals, to kids rising up and leaving dwelling, to going via or watching family members battle critical well being issues — can all deliver a couple of sense of loneliness as you come to phrases with the truth that your life is progressing.

7. Psychological Well being Situations

Psychological well being circumstances like nervousness and melancholy can feed the cycle of persistent loneliness. Research present that loneliness will increase the danger of melancholy and generalized nervousness dysfunction (GAD). 

8. The Isolating Feeling of the Digital Age

Know-how and the digital age supply important advantages relating to connectivity and entry to others. But, for all its good, some elements of the digital age, like social media, are recognized to extend emotions of loneliness. As an alternative of collaborating in social actions and creating significant relationships, youthful individuals and older adults, spend extra time behind a display screen.

Analysis reveals us that extended use of social media is perhaps linked to signs of melancholy. The good paradox right here is that the very factor social media intends to do — join us — may need the alternative impact, as an alternative driving isolation and loneliness though we predict we’re related to others. 

9. Low Self-Esteem

Folks with low ranges of self-worth usually tend to expertise continual or persistent loneliness — low vanity has even been linked to feeling lonely in research. It appears that evidently emotions of worthlessness and concern about how others understand you possibly can stop deep connections in your life. 

“Analysis research present that low vanity and loneliness can affect each other. Vanity can result in emotions of loneliness when people understand lack of acceptance from others.”

Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW

What to Do When You Really feel So Lonely

It’s necessary to do not forget that loneliness isn’t an indication of weak spot. Recognizing your emotions is the primary and most necessary step you possibly can take towards bettering damaging ideas tied to loneliness.

Acknowledge your emotions

Acknowledging your feelings and emotions performs a big position in emotional well-being. Figuring out once you’re lonely or feeling disconnected from others can alleviate a number of the misery you’re experiencing.

Be part of a help group

Help teams may be highly effective assets. They will can help you spend time with others with an identical relationship with loneliness. The consolation you achieve from these social help conferences would possibly even aid you overcome a number of the emotional isolation you expertise and even make a brand new pal within the course of.

“It’s useful to affix a help group when you really feel lonely. It means that you can join with new individuals who could also be sharing related emotions and may perceive what you’re going via. The group can result in shared downside fixing, studying about useful group assets, and gaining a way of belonging.”

Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW

Work out

Figuring out will increase endorphins, recognized temper enhancers that can provide you vitality and motivation to interrupt out of your cycle of loneliness.

Get entangled or volunteer 

Getting concerned or volunteering will aid you make social connections effortlessly, permitting you to regularly change into mentally stronger and extra prepared to achieve out to others.

Do yoga & meditate

Yoga and mindfulness meditation assist heart you, so you possibly can deal with the current, somewhat than fear concerning the previous or the long run. Each actions profit psychological well-being by lowering stress, bettering total temper, and protecting you grounded — all of that are methods to fight emotions of loneliness.


Research have demonstrated that journaling is an efficient technique for enhancing psychological well being. Journaling for psychological well being can foster emotional regulation and aid you determine damaging ideas and habits patterns that may contribute to social isolation.

Maintain a structured routine

People thrive on routine. Sustaining construction can supply stability and reassurance, even during times of loneliness.

Discuss Via Your Emotions at Talkspace

Feeling lonely can stem from quite a lot of causes. Missing significant connections in your life can intensify these emotions. If you happen to’re feeling very lonely, Talkspace is an on-line remedy platform that may supply instruments like individualized remedy and coping strategies that will help you cope with loneliness

Attain out to Talkspace at the moment to be taught extra about taking steps towards understanding your loneliness. With assist, you can discover a approach to construct strong and significant connections that in the end give you a more healthy psychological state.


  1. Steen OD, Ori AP, Wardenaar KJ, van Bathroom HM. Loneliness Associates strongly with nervousness and melancholy throughout the COVID pandemic, particularly in males and youthful adults. Scientific Experiences. 2022;12(1). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-022-13049-9. Accessed August 19, 2023.  
  2. Pantic I. On-line social networking and Psychological Well being. Cyberpsychology, Habits, and Social Networking. 2014;17(10):652-657. https://doi.org/10.1089/cyber.2014.0070. Accessed August 19, 2023. 
  3. Szcześniak M, Bielecka G, Madej D, Pieńkowska E, Rodzeń W. <P>the position of vanity within the relationship between loneliness and life satisfaction in late maturity: Proof from Poland</p>. Psychology Analysis and Habits Administration. 2020;Quantity 13:1201-1212. doi:10.2147/prbm.s275902. https://doi.org/10.2147/prbm.s275902. Accessed August 19, 2023. 

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